Are Your Expectations Too High? | Black Mesh Embroidered Top | 11.02.18
Some people say that the key to happiness is low expectations. If you’re not expecting much, you can’t be disappointed, right? While this might be true, something about stumbling through life with your sights set low seems terribly sad to me. Of course, there are some moments when it’s useful. For example, your grade on that essay you wrote in the two hours before the deadline is always going to be easier to swallow if you’re expecting a fail – I can tell you that for a fact! However, low expectations can actually be downright harmful, especially when they concern relationships. Unfortunately, I can tell you that for a fact, too.
Aside from a brief period in my teens when I didn’t demand my worth from a boy who certainly wasn’t worth me (a mistake I will never make again!), I’ve always gone through life with high expectations. Often, it does lead to disappointment. For example, I spent my teenage years dreaming of a future in London marked by twinkling lights, never-ending music and friendships that would last a lifetime. Instead, the pollution gave me asthma, depression blessed me with a three year creative dry spell and the big city left me lonelier than ever. It’s all good fun in London!
Maybe it doesn’t sound like I’m making a good case for high expectations. However, while the reality of London hasn’t been great, the dreaming was wonderful and served as a huge source of motivation during my teen years. My imaginings provided me with the forward motion I needed to gain my place at university, earn the grades and smash my music exams, but most importantly, I felt excited by life.
During my unhappy time at university, I’ve tried living with my expectations at rock bottom. With my confidence plummeting and my goals diminishing, it’s been difficult to aim high. At times, I didn’t even expect to be alive at the end of the year, let alone complete my degree. Obviously, I’m alive with a 2.1 under my belt so I exceeded my low expectations, but has that made me happy? Far from it, and that’s because achieving the bare minimum can never satisfy you in the way that realising your wildest dreams can.
At the moment, my numbers are waning. My growth across all of my platforms has halted following my rebrand, and this should be extremely disheartening to me. However, while it’s mildly frustrating, the hard feelings end there. It’s just a blip on my path to bigger, better things. If you don’t dream big, you can never achieve the unimaginable. Even if you don’t manage that, you can enjoy the fantasy of it all. For now, I’m forgetting the short term and I’m aiming my arrows high. My problems haven’t gone away, but is it wrong to dream that they will?
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